HEy!

I transffered...i made a huge mistake here..v.v..

http://seedz0fsecret.blogspot.com/

see ya!

Anime?....

Once again i have read the ever inspiring story of Fruits Basket...

For some reason every time i read this story, it gives an impact to me...i don't know why...maybe that's why it became the 1st hit manga in america..

This story is full of deep thoughts that could really help teenagers...and give impact to their lives...honestly? it can really do..

Fruits Basket is a very nice and beautiful story that the writer itself is such a deep thinker that it gives impact to the readers...i want to finish the story...but then it hurts me even more as i come to read it...

WEird ei? why would i get hurt with simply just reading a comic book...you know why i'm so hurt?...coz im jealous...im so jealous that the writer got the same idea as i did...

Even before i have read fruits basket, the idea was already in my mind...I thought it'll make a great story coz its main goal is to help teenagers and touch their lives...but then...Fruits Basket...i lost...

Even if i try and publish my manga someday...wont the reader's say, "isn't this just like Fruits Basket?, all filipino's are the same getting the ideas from other movies or other stories..."

Would it hurt if smeone said that to you?... I can't even compromise anymore...

My heart is so confused right now...hurt...sad...and in realy pain... The story that i've been trying to write, i've been trying to finish has been already finished by soemone else...my idea my original idea is seen as only 'copied'... The title of my Story "seeds of seceret" is copied... no matter how many times i compromise with other people...tehy'd only see my story as 'copied'...

Now question drift to my mind if i should still continue my story...or should i stop it?...

THe only reason why i became so addicted to anime is because, when i was small, i only saw bad animes...i learned that anime is really bad and my classmates would say that i should stolp watching anime coz im a pastor's kid...i should stop...but then i couldn't... so ever since that day i promised myself that i will become a great artist someday and draw the best anime ever and write an anime story that is good, that it could touch the lives of other people... Ever since that day, i loved anime, till this day...

People tried asking me to stop my addiction, and sme even asked why i love anime so much... but i never told anyone my real reason of loving anime..but for some reason i feel that i just have to blurt it out...i know no one will read this blog of mine...but then..someday...this will be of use of something..

RIght now my mind is so confused, there are so many things i want to say, share, tell...but then sometimes, words can't be said...

Anime basically, is not my life...God is my life... I maybe be an anime addict..but i became an anime addict because of God... I wanted to write, i Christian Anime Manga...that'll bring teenagers to God... i want to be the first to write such manga...

A manga that'll make people smile, a manga that'll teach teenagers what true happiness really means... a Manga that'll show who Jesus is...

Now that i've blurted it all out...i juts realized soemthing...

Fruits Basket could've taken the idea from me...but it can never tell me to stop reaching my dream... I will still continue my manga, my story making, i will do my best to give it all and publish it all in two years time...

When i turn 18, Seeds of Secret will be a hit and will be read by alot of people, and it will change the lives of teenagers...This story is not copied, not stolen, not even mine...coz this story is God's story... I will finish this manga, no one can stop me... i give more focus on my manga now..it means less tardiness, but more work...

Do you ever wonder where i get such courage to say that this Manga is going to be a hit? Well let's just say its because, the Creator of All things, is beside me and HE will help me...

The main goal of this Manga...is to bring more people to Jesus...

Seeds Of Secret...never forget it, coz in 2 yrs time it'll be palced in your very hands...:-)

Win? or lose?....

Dear Jesus,

For the past few days, weeks, i've been sensing that every time i enter a contest, i never win no matter how perfect i think my entry is.. in school, in the net, on my studies, everywhere....its as if i was born a loser... and today in school we had a costume and collage contest, then again i lost... when i got home, i was feeling all gloomy. I said to myself..."Am i failing at everything already?" every bad, negative thing came into my mind...So i planned to take a bath and cool off...

Then, a question struck me... a question that really changed my whole perspective... The question is, "Maybe your failing at everything, coz God wants you to learn to be humble, or he's telling you that, you may not be a winner for teh people, but for Him?! you most certainly are..." Man, those lats words really struck me...

I just realized that i've been trying so hard to please all the people around me, so they will like me or they'd recognize me... or even simply 'to be noticed' but then, i was wrong.... It should be you that they see in me... people already expect alot from me, and at times i find it boring or 'lazy' and now i know why i feel that way..its because i take all the credit! me, me, ME! i'm sick and tried of that word... i want to change... i want people to see you in me, and be humble...i want to learn to make right decisions in my life, and realize that i cannot please everybody no matter how hard i try...

I am really a winner in God's eye, and that's way enough for me than being a winner in the eyes of me. I mean i thought about it, i mean why should i please the people around me, when its you that i should pleasE? i mean being a winner in your eyes is far better than being a winner in the eyes of men... Thank you Lord for making me feel better now and teaching me a great lesson...*hug* Thank you...

Your loving daughter, Shiriel.

(PS. Lord? I never even liked my costume! but then i gave my best and became a winner in your eyes, nothing more can be greater than that..*hug*)

Indians...

Dear Jesus,

Look what i made for Angela! hehe i worked hard for this..anyway, i relly love the way it turned out, do you also? hehe ofcourse you do, coz that was your art and you used me to print it out..:3 hehe anyway!

Lord, yesterday i watched the indians dance in the 'world's indegenious tribes' and wel my first impression was..."i want to take a pic with them! they're so cute!xD' hehe so i tried following them, trying to get a pic of EVRY indian...and guess what? i got my wish...but for some reason, something struck me... As i watched one of the 'cutest' Indians dance, i realized something... They were so free and joyful to worship you through they're dancing... you can see the joy in their faces, the excitement, teh thrill of worshipping you... they didn't care how foolish they looked, they just dance with all their might to worship you...then, i looked at myself...and i asked myself, "why can't i do that?" i mean just look at them! i know they have touched your very heart because of their dance,coz they gave their BEST!... You can see them sweat and tired, but still they continue to worship as if there was no tomorrow anymore... even when the songs stopped some of them were still dancing... you can see the real joy of worshipping you through their dance and especially trhough their expressions...

I wonder why i couldn't do that?... I WANT to do that.. i want to worship you with all my heart,soul,body,mind and spirit! i want to touch your heart! i want to put a smile on your face... I want you to feel how grateful i am for ldying on that cross... i want to put a smile on your face... i want to glorify you...

Those indians...what do they have that i don't? Well, it is the freedom of myself... i don't know if anyone could understand me... but i know you do... The freedom to do so much for you, the freedom to erase all insecurities and just worship you, the freedom to not care about what people think when i worship you...

Those indians inspired me... and really made me realize that i should give my BEST to you. I should be FREE to worship you... I should be PURE in worshipping you... but most of all, i should be GLAD to worship you...

I will make a change someday in this world... and these indians has taught me a great lesson on freedom...and soon, i will understand and perfect this FREEDOM that i've been thinking about, and that will be the start of my purpose!

Shiriel

Maybe...

Dear Jesus,

For some reason there's this person that i always want to see...always want to talk to...always want to smile to... There's this person whom i think is kind of special to me already... I'm not sure, but one thing's for sure, i don't want to grow any feelings towards him...First of all, he'll mess up with my thoughts...yeah he'll inspire me, but i might keep on thinking about him, which is not at the right... Lord help me to get rid of this infatuation or watever i'm feeling...make it stop please...i want him to be my friend only and that's it... i know that he's not the one...so please help me from falling for someone i don't want to fall with.. tHnk you....:3

Enough of that...hehe Lord, yah know? i had a weird day today.. but oh well, i know you have a reason...:3 i feel unsatisfied today, but i'm sure tomorrown it'll be filled up...^^ Oh yea! we're starting this campus journal and we havta make a title for it...Help me to make the right title..I'm thinking of Seedz, which means, Serving EmmanuEl in Dedication with Zeal...:3 i'm not sure if its right... but please help me...^^

Lord...i'm asking for some anime art book...please?...i really am craving for anime art books and manga's..xD hehe thanks so much...Lord i don't know...but this day...seems empty,unsatisfied,sad, and lonely...

Shiriel

Tribes

Dear Jesus

I just came from a worship concert of indegenious tribes all over the world! and this is the very first time i saw indians worship you...and they worship you very simply, but somehow it has a great impact. They worship you through dances, and their dances is sure nice, i loved it! i mean they looked like eagles soaring high, freely...they're worshipping you with freedom...

When they danced, the indians, my perspectives in provinces changed... To be honest, i really didn't want to live here in Davao for the reason that, i'll be away from my friends, i'll be adjusting real hard, and there aren't many malls here... So i thought it'll be boring here...and guess what? I was totally wrong....

Davao might have less malls compared to Manila, and DAvao is less civilized than Manila...But for some reason, i like it better here... because of the tribes. The tribes remind me of reality, it reminds me of our culture and how important this is to us... I am just so amazed on how you have created such cultures and tribes... Not only that, the tribes reminds me of how to really worship you... Worshipping you isn't based on high teched instruments or materials, but it is in the heart and soul.... worshipping you isn't all about lookiong good, but rather than making you look good. Davao may be less civilized, but they are more religious and closer to you...

As an anime lover, i wanted to take animation or anything connected to that...but then, my perspective now changed... i want a course that could help me know the different kinds of cultures the world has... in that way i can understand other people's way of worshipping you... but then my Father said that i'm only inspired of what i saw tonight... but i know what i felt... i felt that i needed to take that kind of course...so Now i am praying unto you, to lead me to that course, to lead me to the right school... i know i will take my college here in Davao... please help me Jesus...and i know you will... i thank you for that... I will have that course taken, to know you more, to know how to worship you more, to touch your heart.... I love you so much...

Love you so much, JEsus, Love you so much...SHiriel

Friendship...c=

____________________________________
When there comes a time when you feel your alone,
Just lock your right hand with your left hand,
Then go out and look at the sky,
after that close your eyes and think of me...

Remember we may live apart,
but we still live under one sky,
and i may not be there with you physically,
but in your heart i am there...
____________________________________

Something i piled up and mixed up...:3

Dear Jesus,
To be honest, i never had that stable best friend that i've always wanted... I wanted a bestfriend who'd i can go out with in the beach, shop clothes with, do silly stuff with, or even plain have sleepovers in my home... I did have bestfriends, but for some reason they don't stay long..i don't know if its something wrong with me, or i'm just plain expecting too much... But now?... i realized that i don't need a best friend... coz of you....

Truly, you are the bestfriend that i've been praying for all these years... I've been praying for a male bestfriend... and i just came to realize now, that you are truly the only best friend i could ever had... you may not go to the beach with me, but you made that beach for me.... you may not shop clothes with me, but you supply the money i need for those clothes... you may not do silly stuff with me, but you protect me from silly stuff that can hurt me... you may not have sleepover over my house, but you've always been there to guide me sleep... I knew i had bestfriends before...and they've all changed me... and i did alot of great stuff with them, and truly they are great blessings in my life...

Maybe the reason why i don't have a stable best friend is because, people change, time change, circumstances change...That's what it is...it's life... but one thing that nothing could ever change, is the treasure of the friednship... The memories of a great friendship... If i could just write about every bestfriend i had, i bet they'll all did alot of chnage in my life too...changes that made a better person.. I thank you for giving them to me... ^^ ...

From now on, i will stop asking for a best friend... coz all these years i already had a best friend, waiting for me... and that's you... *hug* and not only that... another reason is that i always did have a best friend... and they're all in my heart... i may not be with them physically, but in my heart they are all always treasured...

Jesus i love you so much...when i'm alone i will just lock my hands together and close my eyes and think of you...your daughter Shiriel, your own song...:3